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Written as the kick-off ficlet for The Return of Oz Drabble Tree at oz_wishing_well. Toby/Mondo.

Beer Commercial Kind of Guy

by Ozsaur

The kiss was like a hot, wet rag stuffed into his mouth. Toby had been kissed by an expert, many times, but Mondo wasn't anywhere near the same class. Maybe kindergarten compared to Keller's doctorate.

Mondo had probably never kissed a man before, but that couldn't explain all the things that were wrong with his technique, or lack thereof. There must have been a long line of ex-girlfriends who had put up with it, never bothering to teach him any better. Now it was Toby's sad duty to teach a grown man how to kiss. Or maybe he'd take a page out of their book and move the show along to blowjobs.

Turned out, Mondo was a beer commercial kind of guy, rather than an epic mini-series. Standing in front of the glass wall, looking up at Keller's shadowed face and listening to Mondo's snores, Toby decided he'd have to put on a better show. But not with Mondo. That guy was lousy in the sack.

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