Why Can't We be Friends? WHY CAN'T WE BE FRIENDS? by Jen Poet: Why can't we be friends? Yo, why the fuck did Burr cancel open mike night? Why can't we be friends? Burr: You try your best to push me into the mud Has anyone ever told you you're a spic Elmer Fudd? Guerra: Why can't we be friends? Why'd that midget bite me when I asked if he knew Tattoo? Why can't we be friends? Morales: You got that weird mouth and a temple that loves to throb Now all you need is spinach and a pipe of corncob Zanghi: Why can't we be friends? Why can't I be on the Sopranos? Why can't we be friends? Pancamo: I buddy up with you Morales, cause Burr belongs on a 'Nam *M*A*S*H* But if you fuck me over, I'll tell all the mooks you named your mustache Tug: Why can't we be friends? Why can't I have a pulse? Why can't we be friends? Supreme Allah: Homeboys gunnin' for me, spics and wops pretend they don't want me hurt Truth is, I'll take 'em all out long as I don't become another damn redshirt Vayhue: Why can't we be friends? Don't come near me with that cello! Why can't we be friends? Hill: Yo, I'd kinda like to go back to bein' the wise wheelchair black Anything but more goddamn days with a target on my back Colonel: Why can't we be friends? Why do people blame me for Carter's stabbing? Why can't we be friends? Gang Extras: Some say, "why don't you talk every once in a while?" But look at Vasquez, he spoke and he got a second smile Giles: Friends, friends Peter, Peter Marie Peter Marie! Friends Alvarez: Couldn't handle reportin' to Glynn, kicked me like a fuckin' cat Now I don't do nothing but jack off and fingerpaint with scat All: Why can't we be friends? Why can't the chorus ever end? Why can't be friends? Why can't be friends?